Finally...an explanation!

My entire life (I'm 68+) I have struggled with the confusion over my obstacle with math problems of most kinds.  I tried so hard in the lower grades to get it right with poor results.  It was believed that because I had every childhood 'illness' known to man that I had suffered brain damage from those sicknesses or had it from chewing lead paint in my crib!

I really couldn't answer the question my mother or father had, "Why don't you get this?"  Or "You are not trying".  Teachers as well as parents, siblings, extended family all believed I was lazy.

I learned not to like school as a result.  I went, didn't fain illness,  no stomach aches, no hooky, but the punishment was daily.  I took the basic math courses to get by in High School and College but when I had to take college algebra to earn my Community College of the Air Force Associates degree, I could not pass the course.  

I am retired now from all employment but in each and every job I ever had, I avoided math or struggled with the task before me.  I found that fractions, and multiplication came easier than addition and subtraction.  Long division was my waterloo.  I almost always had the wrong answer although I did have a good time trying. 

I made all Deans and administrators on the campuses aware of my fears and struggles, and when they had volunteer tutors to assist it only served to add to the frustration I possessed as each had their own methodology and I would have to 'start over' to process the information in my limited and their limited time allowances. 

I am writing to say that I thought it was a joke when I heard there was a diagnosis for this painful short fall.  I am writing to say that any and all remedies going forward will be a God send to students like me who just lived with the shame and embarrassment of being different. 

Believing that this was a shortfall, I have compensated by trying to excel in all I do, and sometimes being self-critical when obviously no one else was.  What a distraction!  I worked extra hard on end of grade tests, sickened myself before those timed tests by anxiety and always feared failure.  

Oddly enough, I have had jobs working in loan departments at Banks, cashiering in various retail departments and stores, and light accounting with Government funding for both the military and the Veterans Administration as well payroll for the employees.

If I could avoid it, I would choose positions that didn't require actual accounting and fiduciary responsibility as I was concerned my miscalculations would cause harm to others. 

This is my story and I am so relieved to tell it.  I just pray for those who are now living to overcome their dyscalculia.  Knowing what it is makes is easier to accept. 

Carol in North Carolina